Freedom to say "No"

Wondering how many people in this life dare to say loudly, openly and honestly - No!

Is it cultural think or what? Why I have to step back to waitress which mix-up order while at the end of the day I have to pay her?

Is it stupidity or what? Why I have to be modest and shut my mouth up while politicians, which took my 'voice', are stealing money, pride and faith of My Country?

Is it blindness or what? Why we keep complaining about crimes, bribes and other illegal stuff if we keep doing it ourselves or encouraging others to do so?

I bet there are thousands more reasons to blame someone else out there... But if we really want others to believe that we are not joking by saying - No! - we have to say it to ourself at first and start believe in its power. Freedom is something you already have...

When all doors are closed

There is one thing which keeps bothering my head in the last month. This annoying thought was provoked by the fact that I'm not really satisfied with current job, employers, etc. Maybe I raise too high requirements or expectations towards a daily job, working environment, relationship between employees and micro-climate overall, social benefits or at least basic social security..? Looking from my point of view those things would be one of the basics which I would try to ensure and implement for my employees if I would be the Boss. But I'm not. And it's not up to me to judge them. Because I might not know the real financial situation of the company and other underneath processes which influencing such behavior.

So then the day comes when you all over the sudden realize that things you are doing are not fulfilling you anymore, you getting more and more tired because of monotonic job, the same problems every day, stagnation and so on. And then - you have a brilliant idea to open a new page in your life and start new things which you always wanted, things which motivates you, things on which you could spend hours daily just because you feel being in a right place at the right moment.

Do you recognize yourself in situation described above? I bet you do. Now there is a questions worth million euros! How to get a job in totally new field without having any practical experience in particular field? How to prove to your potential employer that you could be useful, loyal, fast learner not less than any other more experienced candidate?

The more I stare at the closed doors in front of me, the more I'm willing to jump through the open window. Which means that you have to work on yourself. I'm still afraid of the height, uncontrolled fall and consequences when I will reach the ground, but... Oh, that temptation is so strong!

Don't you wish to change your life a bit?

Seriously, I’m impressed about other peoples’ ability to be creative, stylish, cool, to be talented in sports, cooking or any other activity. I still can’t understand why and how my old fellows are getting married!? Can’t believe that I have to live on my own, look after personal savings, and soon will have to take care of my parents… Kids! They are everywhere! Small, cute, bigger and smaller. How come I don’t have any of them?

What was I thinking about in last 25 years of my life? Why do I feel like I’m behind the time?

Actually, who said that I’m behind the time? The fact that I don’t have girlfriend (I hate this word) means that something wrong with me..? During last few years my heart is open more than ever. I’m more and more keen to go for risk and fell in love with somebody.

Only recently I managed stop stressing about it and let things go. Who knows… maybe after 35 years from now I will look back and mile at myself being independent, free, a bit wild, risky sometimes and childish... That could be a dream of most of old people, isn’t?

Money! God, they are so beautiful, sexy and seductive. They are so powerful, influencing and addictive! I wish my soul could escape from this curse… You know… I went to India for 2 weeks. I saw many people… differently from Pakistan I met there more people happy, but without money.
No, I haven’t spoken to them. Didn’t say hi or didn’t give a single penny. But I saw in their eyes the inner peace. It used to be damn hot outside, dirty, noisy all around you… but this poor man is sitting in the shadow surrounded with serenity. Looking at him you start realizing that all the chaos around you is meaningless!
Aren’t you jealous? Look how busy you are. Check how little time you have every day… Our life looks so pathetic [sometimes].

I love strangers. All kind of strangers. Tall and small; with long hair and no hair at all; with accent and native speakers; poor and rich. And each time I meet one of them – I never ask their name, social status, title at work or where he/she is going or where she/he is coming from.
One smile, one small gesture ‘you go first’ means more than skype account or facebook name. It gives me more mystery. In such moments I love them for the moment I spent with them… don’t you think that a whole life is created of unlimited number of moments. How many of those moments do we remember. So that’s why I chose to enjoy those few moments with strangers in my life…

Everything around me is changing too fast. Faster than I can accept. The one thing which I can count on – is music. The music which I have for years. But all those years haven’t changed the mood they create… Music Gives You Love. Love the music.

P.S. sorry for random thoughts…

When the problems stays behind...

Play the soft music. Use your best headphones. Turn the volume up. Close your eyes and feel how your body lifts up above the bed.

Fly away from your room through the open window. Smell the freshness of the night and brighness of the star. Can you still hear the music? Excellent. Keep floating in the air till your problems appears behind.

Now. Start singing the song as it would be your magic mantra.



But! Be careful. Sunrise will come soon. You have to get back to your bed before the sun shine will kiss your eyes.
Good night!

31 days

What a life!

31 days have passed since I entered to Lithuanian territory. I was going back and playing imagination in my head how I will be meeting my old friends whom I didn't see for more than 2 years, I was dreaming about Lithuanian food and drinks, places I used to visit for daily bases, Lithuanian radio station and all other things which I have mentioned in my previous blog post.

When I met my old fallows, one of the biggest concerns they had about me was: "can you still drink?" Funny, isn't it? I can proudly say that I proved to them and most importantly to myself, that I didn't loose that skill (actually it is a bad, very bad habit). Since the first day at home till yesterday I consumed approximately 20 liters of beer and ~2.5 liters of vodka or similar hard liquor... Now I stopped. But didn't quite. I managed to catch up with most of my friends and finally I settled down.

Now I have another headache. Job hunting. I knew that it won't be easy and I was ready for that. Being in Lithuania I realized that the mindset of employers slightly have changed. When I'm talking to a potential employer I have feeling that they expect from me to make magic things: boost sales starting from the first week (if not - don't even think about bonuses, be glad if we won't fire you).

Rewards or salary. Everybody is aware of fucking crisis in the country and taxes which are raising along with summer heat in the air... But! The harder you work, the higher award you should get. Isn't fair enough? I'm not surprised why companies are complaining about difficulties to find "good" employees. My respond to that is simple: if you want to by winter shoes for USD $5 - be ready to buy another pair of shoes in beginning of the season, because only good quality shoes keeps comfort for more than 1 or 2 years. I sincerely believe that if employer gives me higher salary, I take it as trust in me and I the least what I would like to do is to disappoint him/her and loose position. But I guess it will take time till both sides (employees and employers) will find balance and the market should align labor costs... sooner or later.

And finally - my biggest personal challenge which I can not over come. I went to Pakistan for one and a half year to challenge my worldview, gain professional experience and be recognized for my achievements. Even though I got all those things (more or less) in Pakistan, I find it very hard to sell myself in Lithuania. One thing didn't change in me for sure - it is my natural modesty. Or should I call it as personal complexes..? This one and crucial challenge stops me from getting job of my dream. Most of job offers in Lithuania are either for sales executives (the lowest level) or the top management positions. I don't want to go for the first option after all I have went through being in Lithuania and abroad and I can't apply for the second option because I don't feel being an 'expert' in a specific field: marketing, PR, communication, production, sales, finance, etc.

...but I'm positive and I believe I will get what I deserved at the end of the day. I won't let pressure to keep control on me and won't go for the job offer which I don't like or don't feel like I can do it if all my heart.

Summer came. It should bring positive changes : )

Where are you from?

A few days ago I came back from a trip to India. I went there alone and being a quite small white guy (in Indian eyes - rich tourist) naturally provoked curiosity for the local people. The same as in Pakistan people find the easiest way to approach by asking: Where are you from?

Maybe would be cool to be from one of the largest leading world countries - it would give them a lot of answers by default (without my involvement). However, the reality is totally opposite: I come from a very small, European country, which is quite young and didn't have a chance to stand out especially for the people of South Asian countries like Pakistan, India, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka and the list can go on...

I tried my best to be polite and patient explaining that I'm from LITH-U-A-NIA! No no! Not Australia! No - it is not a state in USA.
I could go on with my own examples but I will use a quote from a book which I got in Mumbai ("Shantaram" by Georgy David Roberts). I found a very good example which illustrates my experience in both countries (Pakistan and India). Reading the given quote below I remembered my trip to the Northern Areas of Pakistan where my friend Sheeraz most probably was going through pretty much the same flow (a dialog between to guys from village in the bus):

- What is he doing here?
- He's visiting my family.
- Where is he from?
- New Zealand.
- New Zealand?
- Yes. New Zealand. In Europe.
- Plenty of money in New Zealand?
- Yes, yes. Plenty. They're all rich, white people there.
- Does he speak Marathi (one of the languages spoken in India)?
- No.
- Hindi?
- No. Only English.
- Only English?
- Yes.
- Why?
- They don't speak Hindi in his country.
- They don't speak Hindi there?
- No.
- No Marathi? No Hindi?
- No. Only English.
- Holy Farther! The poor fool.
- Yes.
- How old is he?
- Thirty.
- He looks older.
- They all do. All the Europeans look older and angrier than they really are. It's a white thing.
- Is he married?
- No.
- Not married? Thirty, and not married? What's wrong with him?
- He's European. A lot of them get married only when they're old.
- That's crazy.
- Yes.
- What job does he do?
- He's a teacher.
- A teacher is good.
- Yes.
- Does he have a mother and a farther?
- Yes.
- Where are they?
- In his native place. New Zealand.
- Why isn't he with them?
- He's traveling. He's looking at the whole world.
- Why?
- Europeans do that. They work for a while, and then they travel around, lonely, for a while, with no family, until they get old, and then they get married, and become very serious.
- That's crazy.
- Yes.
- He must be lonely, without his mummy and his daddy, and with no wife and children.
- Yes. But the Europeans don't mind. They get a lot of practice being lonely.
- He has a big strong body.
- Yes.
- Make sure you feed him properly, and give him plenty of milk.
- Yes.
- Buffalo milk.
- Yes, yes.
- And make sure he doesn't learn any bad words. Don't teach him any swearing. There are plenty of arseholes and bastards around who will teach him the wrong sisterfucking words. Keep him away from motherfuckers like that.
- I will.
- And don't let anyone take advantage of him. He doesn't look too bright. Keep an eye on him.
- He is brighter than he looks, but yes, I will look after him.

So... I think this small dialog illustrates the best of the pure villager in Pakistan/Indian land. I might be wrong in that, but as my blog name says: Point of View : )

Eastern European Funk

Hard to figure-out: is this video really good (official music video for Eurovision Song Contest performed by lithuanians) or I'm simply missing home and everything related to it?



However it is - Go Lithuania! : )

Nostalgia

Black bread, white bread, radio station while driving the car, supermarket in front of my place, old town, streets made from stones, centuries old buildings, river crossing the city, the voice of news reporter on TV every evening, smell of rain in the mid of summer, basketball playground, comfortable bed, potatoes with milk, cold beer, scarf and winter cap, steam coming out of your mouth each time you breath out in winter time, picking berries and mushrooms in summer time in order to save it for winter, electricity 24/7, silence when you want it, privacy, freedom of choice, worm clothes, Lithuanian language, friends, family members, sauna, lake, public transport, local currency, fishing...

...these are just few things I miss from my home.

Back to the basis

PATER noster, qui es in cœlis;
sanctificatur nomen tuum:
Adveniat regnum tuum;
fiat voluntas tua,

sicut in cœlo, et in terra.
Panem nostrum cotidianum da nobis hodie:
Et dimitte nobis debita nostra,
sicut et nos dimittimus debitoribus nostris:
et ne nos inducas in tentationem:
sed libera nos a malo.
Quia tuum est regnum, et potestas, et Gloria,
in saecula.
Amen.

This time I started my blog entry with a prayer in Latin language. Why? Because! When I was talking to my muslim friends, I simply couldn't understand their philosophy about prayers which they 'suppose' to do 5 times a day. The tricky thing is the fact that all prayers are in Arabic language and what is even more interesting is that far not everybody knows Arabic language... Do you get my point?
According my logic: if you are saying a prayer, so it should be very honest. It shouldn't be automatic process. And the least what I would expect is that you would actually understand what are you saying.
Well, it is complicated...

However, I was carrying this dilemma in my head for a quite some time till I came across very random conversation with my CEO about it. And he pointed our very interesting fact which I totally forgot.
For many ages around the Europe Latin language has spread as the dominating language and made major influence on such languages as English, Spanish/Portuguese, French. Even today many phrases and expressions are used in medicine, law, science, etc.

Going back to the point: imagine a poor farmer with his wife and 12 kids going to Church on Sunday morning and the priest is leading mass - in Latin language. What these poor people could possibly understand? No need for answer. It was rhetorical question.

So, maybe we are not so different : )


أبانا الذي في السموات،

ليتقدّس اسمك، ليأتي ملكوتك.

لتكن مشيئتك، كما في السماء كذلك على الأرض.

أعطنا خبزنا كفاف يومنا. واغفر لنا زنوبنا وخطايانا،

كما نحن نغفر لمن أخطأ وأساء إلينا. ولا تُدخلنا في التجارب،

لكن نجّنا من الشرّير.

لك الملك، والقوة، والمجد، الى أبد الآبدين.

آمين

Nun vs. Muslim women

First impression of Muslim women and Christian Nun:
- Both are practicing modesty;
- Both covering hair;
- Both are wearing cloths covering almost whole body;
- Both are religious;
- Both are staying away from direct contact with a men (at least until marriage).

To be continued...

New Generation

Last week I had an honor to attend one of the most exciting even which is happening in 110 countries around the world.
I had an opportunity to attend LC Karachi EB elections (sorry for very technical language)... My few impressions which I got through out the day:

# LC members are forced to stay in election. To do that the current EB had to make VP elections at first and move LCP candidates to the last point of agenda - otherwise people would start leaving elections right after LCP selection. And this would cause problems because plenary would not have enough true members to give their votes for VP candidates. Well done!
I came just for few hours, but ended up staying for whole day... just because I wanted ask LCP candidates few questions personally.

# It was really interesting to observe and compare the performance of new members and older members who are applying for certain VP position. I was surprised that some newies were much stronger in presentation, stating their opinion and demonstrating knowledge compare to old members (who supposed to be 'advanced' in all levels). I have may favorites, but because results are not announced who is selected and who is not - I won't mention their names.

# Each candidate for VP position was very focused on particular area. Basically all speeches and presentations were about: I, me and myself... that is the feeling I got listening them.
Meanwhile I kept comparing elections which I used to see back in old days when I was working in LC Siauliai. We used to underline following words: LC, team, goals, vision, dream...
I have no doubt about each candidate’s professionalism but somehow I missed a spirit of AIESEC. AIESEC in general: Why the hell exists and what we working for and for whom. By listening them I had feeling that "we do exchange or marketing because that is the structure of organization and someone needs to do that. I take this role to manage certain functional area, because I want practical experience - for myself". Well... I want to believe I'm wrong, but I couldn't read anything else between the lines of their speeches.

# The individualism and lack of knowledge of AIESEC was shocking! I couldn't believe. I asked LCP candidates questions which in my opinion they should know for sure: 1) please describe Change Agent concept and how do you fit in that role; 2) What is the AIESEC essential uniqueness compare to other NGO (especially those which run exchange program or working on leadership skills). To tell you truth - I didn't get answers which I expected... their answers were far from my understanding... It's good that I didn't ask them to name 5 principles of AIESEC XP or traditional question (at least in my LC) - "what are AIESEC values" : )

After all a new leader is selected - Congratulations! Wish you strength in fighting with challenges, patience with a time and ambitious results.

Cheers!

Cleaning my closet

When I came to Pakistan, Karachi, I was lucky, because I got closet. It is pretty big. I can fit a lot of things. In beginning I didn't have too much stuff, so my closet was more than half empty. All over the suddent I started to collect all kind random stuff. Now, when I look back, I'm asking myself: why the hell I ever brought all this to my closet..?
Today I have a problem - there simply too much stuff. I can't reallocate as this room is only one property I have... I can't simply throw it away either as things are mixed so much that sometimes is hard to identify what is what.
Everyday when coming back home I find all that mess. Damn it - it's so annoying, you can't even imagine.
I hate myself for this mess because I can't even move out because I wouldn't be able to carry everything along with me... I can't even make more shelves.
Oh well, charity is always serves for good. But I doubt if some one would need my stuff. Pretty sure each and everyone has it's own ways to manage closets.
I guess this is my true nature: the more space I have - the more stuff I keep with me. Wish I could be a tourist with only one back bag... Would avoid so much trouble.
I need to get angry on myself and clean my closet...